Dear Ivan:

It was just your 5th Birthday!  Happy Birthday my boy!  This is a milestone indeed.   Time to put away those childish things . . . .  No, seriously put them away . . . .  Did you hear what I said? Put them . . . am I talking to myself?  No?  I didn’t think so.  So, now pick up those toys and put them where the belong. . . . Today . . . .No, not after you have a snack, now as in “now, now, not later now.”

Thank you.

Okay, so as I was saying, time to put away those childish things, and–

What?  No.  I don’t know why the pirate has a parrot.  Maybe he likes parrots.  Yes, I know dogs are more fun.  Maybe the dog doesn’t like his ship.  What? No, I don’t think pirates take trains anymore . . . .  Yes, it’s okay if you have some goldfish.  How many?  10.  Okay, 20.

Look, can we get back to the birthday wishes.

What?

Yes, Mommy will make sure to start planning your birthday for next year right away.

Okay, so can I do the birthday-

What?

Yes.  We can watch a movie.  We can do this some other time.

Meantime, have a great year big boy!

Love always,

Daddy