This past Sunday, June 5, 2011, my wife and I got married.  For us and our families, it is a big deal.  For you, the readers of this blog, it may not be that big of a deal.  You have lives, issues, troubles of your own.  The last thing you need is to read this blog as I carry on in a self-congratulatory way about my cool milestones.  No.  You turn to these pages for comedy, because, I am, after all, a comic.  So you expect funny.  You expect laughs.  You expect sarcasm and pithy ideas that will give you a chuckle and ease your burden and make your troubles, less . . . well, troubling.

 

And, you are right to expect that from me.  I am a comic.  I advertise myself as such.  And, I pride myself on making people laugh and being able to provide my audience with enjoyable times.

 

But, with your kind permission, I need to deviate from that model briefly.  See, the thing is, I need to talk about our wedding.  Well, not so much our wedding, so much as our wedding in the context of a bigger picture of marriage history in this country.

 

What am I talking about?  It’s a good question.

 

Here it is:  My wife and I are an interracial couple.  Nowadays, that’s not that unique.  It’s still not routine or commonplace, but it’s a growing phenomenon.  There are many couples like us, and our numbers are ever growing.

 

But, here’s the thing.  There was a time not long ago (in fact, not much before I was born) when doing what I’m doing, being what I’m being – a White man married to a Black woman – would’ve been illegal in much of this country.  ILLEGAL.  Not frowned upon.  Not socially unaccepted.  ILLEGAL.  As in “throw you in jail” illegal.

 

And, because of two very special people, two ordinary, and yet very special people, all that changed.  And, so, as I said, if you’ll excuse this deviation from my usual monkey-shines and jokes and whiny, kvetchy, humor, I’d like to pay my respects to these two people — two heroes (in every sense of the word) — Mildred and Richard Loving.  And, I’d like to do that by reposting here the statement that Mildred issued on the 40th anniversary of the landmark case, Loving v. Virginia, in which the Supreme Court ruled that interracial marriage in the United States is legal.  It is an opportune time to do this, as my wife and I couldn’t be married without Mildred’s and Richard’s fight for justice and because June 12 is Loving Day the anniversary of the Supreme Court’s decision.

 

So, without further ado, the words of Mildred Loving:

 

LOVING FOR ALL

By Mildred Loving (Prepared for Delivery on June 12, 2007, The 40th Anniversary of the Loving vs. Virginia Announcement)

“When my late husband, Richard, and I got married in Washington, DC in 1958, it wasn’t
to make a political statement or start a fight. We were in love, and we wanted to be
married.

We didn’t get married in Washington because we wanted to marry there. We did it there
because the government wouldn’t allow us to marry back home in Virginia where we
grew up, where we met, where we fell in love, and where we wanted to be together and
build our family. You see, I am a woman of color and Richard was white, and at that
time people believed it was okay to keep us from marrying because of their ideas of who
should marry whom.

When Richard and I came back to our home in Virginia, happily married, we had no
intention of battling over the law. We made a commitment to each other in our love and
lives, and now had the legal commitment, called marriage, to match. Isn’t that what
marriage is?

Not long after our wedding, we were awakened in the middle of the night in our own
bedroom by deputy sheriffs and actually arrested for the “crime” of marrying the wrong
kind of person. Our marriage certificate was hanging on the wall above the bed.
The state prosecuted Richard and me, and after we were found guilty, the judge declared:
“Almighty God created the races white, black, yellow, malay and red, and he placed
them on separate continents. And but for the interference with his arrangement there
would be no cause for such marriages. The fact that he separated the races shows that he
did not intend for the races to mix.” He sentenced us to a year in prison, but offered to
suspend the sentence if we left our home in Virginia for 25 years exile.

We left, and got a lawyer. Richard and I had to fight, but still were not fighting for a
cause. We were fighting for our love.

Though it turned out we had to fight, happily Richard and I didn’t have to fight alone.
Thanks to groups like the ACLU and the NAACP Legal Defense & Education Fund, and
so many good people around the country willing to speak up, we took our case for the
freedom to marry all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court. And on June 12, 1967, the
Supreme Court ruled unanimously that, “The freedom to marry has long been recognized
as one of the vital personal rights essential to the orderly pursuit of happiness by free
men,” a “basic civil right.”

My generation was bitterly divided over something that should have been so clear and
right. The majority believed that what the judge said, that it was God’s plan to keep
people apart, and that government should discriminate against people in love. But I have
lived long enough now to see big changes. The older generation’s fears and prejudices
have given way, and today’s young people realize that if someone loves someone they
have a right to marry.

Surrounded as I am now by wonderful children and grandchildren, not a day goes by that
I don’t think of Richard and our love, our right to marry, and how much it meant to me to
have that freedom to marry the person precious to me, even if others thought he was the
“wrong kind of person” for me to marry. I believe all Americans, no matter their race, no
matter their sex, no matter their sexual orientation, should have that same freedom to
marry. Government has no business imposing some people’s religious beliefs over
others. Especially if it denies people’s civil rights.

I am still not a political person, but I am proud that Richard’s and my name is on a court
case that can help reinforce the love, the commitment, the fairness, and the family that so
many people, black or white, young or old, gay or straight seek in life. I support the
freedom to marry for all. That’s what Loving, and loving, are all about.”

 

 

Thanks Mildred.  We owe you.

 

(For more on Loving Day, please see: http://www.lovingday.org/ and www.mixedandhappy.com)